Talking about the Rangers, unless I decide to talk about something else

Posts tagged ‘poorly executed introductions’

Playoff Predictions! PROGNOSTICATIONS!

So I meant to do this a couple days ago and I didn’t. But, then again, who gives a shit? The good thing about having a blog that no one reads is that I can play by my own rules, much like every action movie protagonist ever. Additionally, I think I could be described as a loose cannon. My life has gone to some weird places, much like this introductory paragraph (note: I realized after I finished this post that “Poorly Executed Introductions” is my 2nd most used tag).

ANYWAY, I’m going to make a few Rangers predictions and a few NHL predictions as well. I hope that you enjoy them and they all come true and I consequently look like a genius. Away we go.

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That Brawl at the Start of Rangers vs. Devils

When I saw what lineup the Devils were starting with last night, it was pretty clear DeBoer was calling out Torts. Since my brain is just a weird place, my reaction can be described no better than in this picture:

I’m not sure whether this makes Torts the Jules in this situation, but it I’m pretty sure DeBoer is Brett. And judging by the blood on his face, I think that makes Ryan Carter the Marvin here. I get to be Winston Wolf, because this is my blog and I make the rules. Every introduction I’ve ever written has been exactly this genius.

I’ll get this out of the way: I don’t really care for fights like the one that started off Monday’s game against the Devils. In concept, at least. I think fights really should be a part of the game only when used to make a player answer for a dirty play (like jumping on a guy for running your team’s goalie), or in extreme cases to give your team some extra motivation (think Vinny Lecavalier fighting Jarome Iginla in the 2004 cup).

Having said that, oh man that was so heavy metal. There were too many fights at once for the main camera to see it. Play was delayed for like 10 minutes so they could clear bloody ice shavings off the ice surface. It got the crowd going and the teams going enough that it felt more like a playoff game than any other game the Rangers have played this year.

A lot has been made of Torts and Pete DeBoer exchanging unkind words about starting line-ups with fighters at each other’s arenas, but it’s pretty clear that they’re both in the wrong. Torts did it in Jersey then acted indignant when DeBoer did the same thing. DeBoer did the exact same thing last night and less than 3 hours after doing it acted righteously indignant about Torts doing it weeks ago. It was childish, and kind of makes both teams and coaches look shitty.

Also, the Devils have some tough dudes, but why in the name of Allah would Pete DeBoer want to start a game against the Rangers that way? There’s no way it accomplishes anything except guaranteeing a more physically brutal game, and that pretty clearly favors the Rangers style of play. I understand the desire, but it is a coach’s job to put emotion aside and do what gives your team the best chance to win. In the end it was a bad choice by DeBoer that led to a win that clinched the Rangers a playoff spot and hopefully ends their recent slump.

Hey Gang!

I’m kidding, I don’t actually say “gang.” Unless I’m referring to criminal organizations or “Sons of Anarchy,” in which case it would be accurate and appropriate.

Hi, I’m Jack and I’m really bad at introductions. I started this blog with the intention of writing self-indulgent opinion posts about the New York Rangers, and I intend to do just that. Occasionally, I’ll digress and go on a tangent that has nothing to do with that topic. I intend to justify that by assuming no one will ever read a word of this.

For the most part, I plan on avoiding game recaps because they’re boring and also avoiding advanced stats because I fear and completely don’t understand them. (Kidding. Primarily I think they don’t say much about a player without a lot of context, and that just seems like another way of saying they’re not evolved enough to be helpful or insightful yet. Except DIGR and PDO.) Mostly I’ll stick to opinion and the occasional analysis, but I’ll also bring some funny as well. It’d be hard not to if Torts keeps giving the greatest press conferences in the history of the world. Imagine what it’s like when he gets upset at the dinner table. Presumably this.

Anyway, hope you all enjoy whatever you read on here, and feel free to comment. Unless you’re a dick. I’m sorry for cursing. As always, let’s go Rangers.

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